It took me 5 months to relapse.. /’:

why…im so scared..idw2 fall back into this trap again but i will not cannot eat.

Everyone's all like, your life.is perfect, why so unhappy?
Me: Hey..
Him: Hi. How are you, beautiful?
Me: I'm great. (Thinking: I'm tired, depressed, hungry, suicidal and I need food..and Im fat.)
Him: Good:) I'm glad.
Me: -Breaks down crying-

I’m so fucking hungry and lightheaded..and irritable :’(

Breakfast: 100 cal

Half a pancake and low calorie hot chocolate